I don't get it, why do i love someone so much and they don't even care if i'm smiling or crying. i miss him so much and i would do anything to have him back except actually be with him. he hurt me so badly and i would put it all away if only he tried and showed me how much he loves me. i just want him to promise me the world even if i know he will never give it to me but at least he shows he cares.
i'm so sick of crying myself to sleep, i shouldn't be thinking bout him, he shouldn't be effecting me like this. i just want to be happy...with him. i dream of that Blair and Chuck love that no matter what they go through he loves her and would give anything to see her happy. i know its T.V and no guy or relationship in the world like theirs is good in anyway coz i truly believe he shouldn't hurt you to realise how much he needs you.
my whole body hurt:( i don't want to cry anymore. i miss him, i miss the way he looks at me and the way he laughs, the way he got embarrassed when i look at him straight in the eyes, the why he said my name, the sound of his voice, his touch and that feeling of nothing nothing else matters when i'm with him. i need you in my life i need to feel that joy again and smile, truly smile and not compare every guy i know with you. i need you so badly it hurts. why can't you need me like that. but tomorrow i'll carry on with my day like i never wrote this and like you never were apart of my life
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